In the news...

Order up…

Socks. Yes. Soooooocksss. I am absolutely repeatedly whispering that in a conspiratory manner as I type – clasping my hands together, of course. I may have cackled once or twice. Henceforth, I shall not wear socks. Thanks for asking, I’ll explain. Ok. Fine. That’s a lie. I’m always cold. My definition of nudity includes socks. But… Continue reading Order up…

In the news...

Don’t give a…

Oh, look! It’s another day!!! “What to do?” they wonder… Got it! Still don’t give a !@#$ about letting people die. Maybe wear that new outfit. Oh and take a photograph of myself like the kids do! #Swag. I think I have that but perhaps find the definition first… Definitely have whatsherface schedule lunch at… Continue reading Don’t give a…

Random encounters...

It’s not me, it’s you…

Walk away. Just !@#$/^ walk away. Yeah, that’s not what happened when I saw the “unattended” bag on the floor. Don’t get your hopes up too much, Liam Neeson does not make a cameo in this one. It would have been nice if he did though. Annnnnyway, so I walk in and that was the… Continue reading It’s not me, it’s you…

Hmmm...

January meet Halloween…

Say whaaat? Halloween the October loveliness with January the…January? I know, that last part was just really creative and impressive! Do stay with me, there are dots to be connected. I promise, on the life of your phone, I’m seriously serious. You didn’t expect that level of seriousness, did you? I’ll give you a moment. Ready? Ok, so… Continue reading January meet Halloween…

Say what?

The American…

Sorry George Clooney, suave as you are, you and your film are for another day. I wish some of the things I hear were scripted…perhaps films like Monty Python illuminating the lack of common sense that we can collectively suffer from. Life of Brian is my favorite and I particularly enjoy the scene Brian unsuccessfully… Continue reading The American…

Random encounters...

Hey, stranger…

“I wanna kill you but you’re nice so have a nice day.” OK, fine, so that’s not exactly what he said. Let me start with saying that like many others, I was always told not to talk to strangers. I did quite well as a child. Not so much as an adult. I choose to… Continue reading Hey, stranger…

Hmmm...

Innocence, ticket for one…

“Oh, to be a child again!” Often accompanied by a sigh, the phrase is usually exclaimed with the kind of longing Plankton on Spongebob Squarepants has when inquiring about the Crabby Patty formula. I’ve used it every now and then. But what does it mean? Would I accept a one way ticket to childhood? **I… Continue reading Innocence, ticket for one…

Hmmm...

The dangling finger…

Got hit by a truck after being mauled by a bear while running away from angry bees which went into a stinging frenzy after accidentally hitting their hive while jumping away from the poison ivy. That my friends, may qualify as 10/10 pain on the pain scale. Maybe. I’m sure you could imagine a more miserable… Continue reading The dangling finger…